Sunday, August 15, 2010

In The Middle

Kenners is my "middle". If you have three children, you know what I mean. One of my main concerns when I was pregnant with Kam? That Makenna would become the middle child. Most of the time I feel like we are very conscientious. But, let's face it, Sierra is the oldest ~ she naturally gets to do more ~ and she sort of has a way about her that demands attention. I'm thinking this is an "oldest" thing. And Kam. Oh Kam. She is a handful. Have I mentioned that already? And she's the baby. She's loud, she's energetic, she can be a bit . . . pilly, and if Sierra demands attention, then Kam doubly demands it!

So, sometimes I worry that Kenners gets a little lost. It hurts even typing that because I want her to always feel how special she is to me. To always feel that she has my undivided attention. Ugh. Mommy Guilt. Anyway.

So, Sunday morning she seemed a little emotional. I could tell that she just needed some love and attention, so we decided that some one-on-one Mama time was in order. After church Sierra and Kam went to visit Nana and Grandpa, and Kenners and I spent some time crafting.

And drinking our own special drink we made. We called it a snowflake. Which is just what we needed in our 95 degree heat today.

Ahhhh. That's better :)


So, lay it on me. How do you make the time for one-on-one?

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♥Amber Filkins♥ said...

Sigh. Liz, it is so good to see you. I was thinking about you this morning, and wondering how you've been. I haven't been around a whole lot.

I just love seeing you and your girlies on here. I am so glad that you and Kenners had some good one on one time.


Connie W said...

I agree that it's important to have one -on-one time with the kids. They need a break from each other as much as they need time with us.

M loves to go that's our thing and iKeith and Alex go to Lowe's.

What I really want to do is start having little dates with Alex. Just he and me.

So glad that you and Kenners got some time together. You are both so beautiful!

Busy Bee Suz said...

This is so sweet!
When my girls were little, it was hard to get the one on one time. Now, it is easier though. And I only have 2...but wish I had 3!!!

Colleen said...

She is so special, and you are awesome. I often feel that way about my 2 middle children, but I am lucky that they have each other. So that's my answer...have another baby :) (You know that's my answer to everything!)

Bon said...

I think about one-on-one all the time too. It's definitely something we have to be so mindful of right now, otherwise it would never happen for us! I find that I can steal moments during the day if I'm focused...not the same as going off alone, but I do try to zero in on each of my children throughout the day with unexpected hugs, kisses and aiming conversation in their direction. I've also really been working on not letting my oldest son interrupt my second son or speak for him - not sure if that's an issue for you, but I find that my outspoken and articulate oldest often try's to speak for the little boys.

Isn't time with just one so special? I love that feeling of connection and how my children emerge as individuals in a new way when we are alone.

Your "Kenners" is darling.

Catherine Anne said...

You are beautiful I just wanted to make sure to tell you. I love the photo of you two. I also feel this way with Sunshine... I am always thinking of it in the back of my mind. I feel as long as we do remember this and do what we can to to make sure they do not become lost in the mix. We are then doing the best we can~

Kelli @ RTSM said...

I feel the exact same way about Grant sometimes. Henry can be trouble sometimes...and Eli is the baby still. Grant just kind of goes with the flow! I still want one more so that Grant isn't really the middle child:)

Becca said...

Good for you momma!!! And such a beautiful picture!

I let the kids pick what THEY want to do with me or hubby- they get one-on-one and they dictate what we do. It is not always consistent, but that's ok. It makes it special when we do it!!


Angela said...

Oh Liz, maybe its just an emotional day for me, but this picture literally brought tears to my eyes. You and Kenners are absolutely gorgeous and you are the most amazing mamma ever. I'm so lucky to call you my friend.

shortmama said...

It can be so hard to sneak in some one on one time. Especially with my oldest. With Layla its easy because she is here with me all day while Rhiannon is at school. Probably the biggest way I make time for Rhiannon is that Layla goes to bed earlier so that allows some special snuggle time for just Rhiannon and I. And on the weekends when Levi is here then one of takes each girl so that they get special time just hanging out or going on a quad ride for Rhiannon and Levi

Kelli said...

That is the sweetest thing and I'm sure she enjoy each moment with you. We try and do that often too, more with Jamison right now but also with Caleb. Rondell and Jamison do Home Depot once a month and I think it's good for the both of them. She's a sweet "middle."

~~Mel~~ said...

You are the best mommy and I just know you are doing your best to make each of your girls feel special in their own unique ways.

Being the mother of an 'only' it's easier to spend one on one time...but then there is this thing called 'work' that's get in the way lol.

I haven't been around much...unfortunately been dealing with a lot of not so fun stuff...

Foursons said...

Liz, the fact that you're so aware of the "middle child syndrome" will make that girl feel extra special and loved. She is precious and I have a hard time believing she'll ever feel anything less than a princess.

Jenny said...

That pic of you two is beautiful!

I'm a middle child, so I know exactly what you mean. However, I think I turned out ok :)

He & Me + 3 said...

I have a middle child and yes...they do need that special time. Love this post. Your picture is just precious.

mindy2780 said...

Finding time for one on one with all my kids is a concern now that I have three. I do worry about Owen becoming the middle child. I had hoped for a girl this time because I felt that if he was the only boy the middle child thing wouldn't be such a big deal. but we get Ben (and I wouldn't trade him for any girls!) and Owen is the middle. Madeline is the oldest and my only girl and Ben is the baby. I know I will have to work hard to make sure Owen, or any of them, never ever feel lost in the shuffle.
It sounds like you two had a great afternoon!

MomBrose said...

We have the same set up here so I know *exactly* how you feel. Skylar demands the least attention, so she gets the least attention. I try to take one child when I run errands after daddy gets home. They don't seem to care if it's the grocery's the one on one time they crave. When we use our "jewel jar" system for rewards, one of the rewards is a special outing with mom or dad alone. I thought they would choose that treat more, but the girls really wanted to share their treats with their sisters. It's sweet really. I think sometimes we impose the guilt on ourselves and the kids don't seem to notice that much.
But you're a good mama to pick up on the cues that Kenners needed some special time. That last picture is just beautiful!


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